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Discussion: African American Sisters

Created on: 06/11/07 04:17 PM Replies: 95

mskaylea71
African American Sisters
06/11/07 4:17 PM

I was wondering if there are any African American Single Women trying to conceive? If so, can you give some advice to a sister that is about to start down this wonderful journey. @.@

Dreamer



Joined: 06/25/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
07/12/07 7:45 AM

mskaylea71,

HI,

I really don't get on this forum much, but I wanted to say HI!. I am in the same situation as you. I am 31 and Mr. Right did not stop to ask for the correct directions...:-)I will start my IUI in a couple of weeks. I will start taking Clomid on CD 3. It is weird doing this process as an AA female...the stereotype is that we are all single mothers. I have a decent job and a great support system. There are limited AA donors, I have chosen a hispanic donor from a different bank. I am very happy with my choice. I am hoping I will get pg on the first cycle....I hope your process is a smooth and happy one.

shalonda
Re: African American Sisters
09/22/07 10:19 AM

Hello my sister
i feel what you are saying i recently began CC, and i am nervous. I too was very skeptical, and i am just reading and researching, i would like to start planningthe SApring. I am a successful woman with my masters and i work with children and i just dont want them to get the wrong idea. There is so much stereotypical info out there but its really time for me to have my own..

lemon
Re: African American Sisters
09/25/07 3:27 PM

mskaylea71,

Hi all! I'm an AA 33 year old female who is currently pregnant via a CCB donor. I sure can identify with all of the concerns regarding the stereotypes of black women as single mothers. But like all of you, I am a professional woman with a great support system. Race was not a huge factor for me since I went with a Nordic donor and was successful on the first try with his sperm(this was after many, many failed attempts with other donors). I am currently 16 weeks and counting. Anyway, I wish you all well on your adventures to motherhood. :)

mommie1
Re: African American Sisters
12/11/07 6:26 PM

Hello everyone,

I was hoping that there was some kind of support group for us single AA women. I'm a 36 year old female who's always dreamt of being a mother like you all. I've been through my share of failed relationships with men and I have not yet been blessed with that special someone God designed just for me yet, but nevertheless I haven't given up and won't give up. Just the same I don't feel that I have to put my dreams of motherhood on hold because of that. I feel that I'm not getting any younger, I'm at that point in my life where I'm really ready. To make things more complicated the female issues with my body simply will not allow me to wait another 2+ years to have one. I'm in the process of finally purchasing my first home and the cherry on top for me is to become a mom. I've never been shy about telling people that I'm very much willing to go to a sperm bank to find my frozen papa, but because of all the sterotypes, myths, and such I have yet to make the final decision. So, when I found this chat site for CCB I got extremely excited about the possible reality. When I found the AAS chat room and read all of your stories I found that a load was lifted off of my back because there was someone out there just like me that I can identify with and going through the same things and feelings that I was. I to am not hell bent on only an AA male as a donor, so that doesn't bother me. I guess once I get my house I'll be giving this route more serious thought and putting the wheels in motion. I want to say thank you to you all for reaching out and sharing your experiences. It has helped me get pass my mental hang-ups and move forward. I'm still holding out hope that I don't have to take this route, but it's nice to know that there are other safe and wonderful options to fulfill my dreams.

shalonda
Re: African American Sisters
12/16/07 2:37 PM

lemon,
hello my sister. I have not been in this site for a minute and i just wanted to c how my strong Black sisters are doing. Ive been doing alot of reseach at other sights looking for that special african or native American Man, i just cant go inter-ratial right now. I have not gotten desperate yet...This world is so confused right now i would not want to have to explain another situation to my unborn child. Im still looking , im not in a rush rush, but am very anxious "innerly". Keep me posted and look at other donor sites dont limit yourself.
keep in touch

shalonda
Re: African American Sisters
12/16/07 2:45 PM

mommie1,
Hey my sister dont give up on being patient waiting for the AA donor.I too wish they had a group for us. I am determine to make that "clone" child. Its so amazing and new to me to see how i can select who my child's father or should i say his DNA, because i want a closed account and i also want twin cause i dont want to do it again, and i dont want my child to be alone. I have not begun ordering yet just consciously looking for that special sperm. I have a wonderful endocronologist who is working with me in getting my insides prep and ready so there want be any problems (irregular menses all my life) when im ready. But beleive me if i see that AA or Native american man that fits the bill im on it.

shalonda
Re: African American Sisters
12/16/07 2:53 PM

Congratulation,

did u use clomid or any fertility treatment, also what is the nordic.

QLittlestar



Joined: 11/02/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
01/05/08 8:21 PM

shalonda,
I am new to this whole thing. I applaud you ladies for getting started in your early thirties. If I knew I was going to be 40 and unmarried, I would have started way back then. I have been traveling for a year and met a beautiful young man from Spain who has offered to be my donor. Don't let the race thing keep you from your dreams of motherhood and Nordic by the way are usually the Blond haired, blue eyed people of Scandinavia. Having children of mixed ancestry will open up the world to us. We are strong and by teaching our children who they are whether mixed or not, we make them whole. I look forward to this experience and wish all of you the blessings of pregnacy.

Demmie



Joined: 08/04/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/21/08 12:19 PM

mskaylea71,

Hello Ladies. I'm new to this board but not CCB and was wondering if any of you are still around. Im a 36y.o AA
and I concieved with donor sperm from ccb.

QLittlestar



Joined: 11/02/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/21/08 12:28 PM

Hey Demmie,

Some of us are still around, hopefully the other ladies that started on the board are busy with their little bundles of joy they have not had time to post. Are you pregnant now or did you give birth already? Was this your first time?

Quinnette
(formerly of NYC)

Demmie



Joined: 08/04/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/21/08 1:16 PM

QLittlestar,

I started down this path in fall of 2001. After failed attemps it was revealed I had fertility problems. I took a break for awhile. Then in 2005 I went to a differnt doctor and after 3 attempts with them, 12 in total, I now have a 20 month old daughter. And I do understand how busy things get. As I type this she is asleep on my lap.

How are things with you?

QLittlestar



Joined: 11/02/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/21/08 2:11 PM

Demmie,
That is so wonderful! Good on ya! I am to start in April. You are a bit younger so you have the advantage. I am 44 and I am just hoping that the fact that I never took BC pills will work in my favor. I have two friends who at 40 are having difficulties which scares me, but I am optimistic despite my age and weight. I am hoping also that being Black works to my advantage.

shalonda
Re: African American Sisters
02/22/08 6:45 AM

Demmie,
hey lady ,i saw that u and my other sister were chatting and i hope that im not to late to jump on in...im still searching ccb for the almost perfect father, while i work with trying to monitor my ovulation time, it very difficult for me ssince i haveirregular period, but im a determined 30 year old in a 25 yr. old body. I t good to khow u didnt give up and success was at the end of the road for u. You sound great and i know your daughter is great. did u find the same race the pick is very scarce and when u found your match did you order the essays and voice and social evaluation ,,you know all that stuff what was useful in your choic for a donor... and are you trying again...im glad you havent forgotten about the soon to be mother's

keep in touch and congrats again

QLittlestar



Joined: 11/02/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/22/08 1:20 PM

Hey Ladies
Did you catch the episode of Oprah where they had the grown up children of donor conceived children? Your thoughts.

Missy



Joined: 11/29/08
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/22/08 4:55 PM

QLittlestar,
My bestfriend told me I have to see Oprah and she said it was about these children and donors, but I did not ask her more about it.

jonenicky
Re: African American Sisters
02/22/08 8:41 PM

Missy,
Hi. I am glad this post was reactivated. I am 38 yo and I am trying for the first time starting in March. I am still trying to find a donor; the pickings are SLIM for af am donors. I may use a donor of a different race, most likely asian as I am part chinese (1/8) and 1/8 irish. I identify and look black and believe that each child even if mixed race, will ultimately choose their identity. Luckily, my family member span from dark to light with all kind of variations, so hopefully whoever I choose, he/she will feel at home with us.

I watched the oprah show and it was very eye opening. I still believe while using a donor is not ideal, if you love, support and protect your child he/she will be healthy.

I put career first for so long that I waited. I hope not too long. I am happy that there are other sisters making the leap.

QLittlestar



Joined: 11/02/09
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/22/08 10:05 PM

jonenicky,
I think if you have such mixture of races within your family, your child will fit in and feel loved. I will start trying at the end of April when my hot young Spanish man will be here for a visit. I hope to store as much of his "nectar" as possible. My concern about AA donations is I think because it is so rare, it is possible that they use the same donor for many more recipients.

Missy



Joined: 11/29/08
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/23/08 5:28 AM

jonenicky,
That is great you are trying for the first time in march. This is my second time-iui. I am just waiting for the results (Next Friday). I used a donor from a diff. race and I am ok with that. But my situation is diff. I am AA and I am with someone. So I need that mixture also and their are not a lot of hispanics in the search at ccb, well the one I am looking for. But even though your single and I am not we could still vibe because we have at least one thing in common CCB donors (smile)

Missy



Joined: 11/29/08
Posts: 0
Re: African American Sisters
02/23/08 5:41 AM

Missy,
I am so sorry! I read one of your messages and it stated that you was not single/ I read someone else message before yours thinking it was you and responed to you as a single woman. So please take out the single part of the message and read the rest. I guess just waking up coming straight to the computer is not always good.
Im going back to sleep :)
Talk to you later
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